Let me set the stage a little bit here. My wife's family isn't particularly close.We live about 30 minutes from her parents and see them about once a month, and pretty much all the major holidays. Her three brothers are scattered about the world and we see them maybe once a year, and when we do see them, we don't have a lot to say to each other. One of her brothers live about 30 minutes from us but we don't see them much more often than that. They often don't show up for holidays, despite living so close. And I've never really connected with my nieces or nephews. We just never seemed to have anything to talk about, and I never felt like I should try a force myself on them, since they seemed a bit uncomfortable around me. I've never been super happy about that but, what can you do?
So this is the context where my oldest nephew comes up to me as soon as we arrive at my wife's parents house, and insists I tell him about "all the stuff I've been posting on Facebook." He's in his early 20s, and always seemed focused on sports. At first I had to figure out what he was talking about, But once I got that he was interested in my posts about the theater I've doing, the conversation took off. I was a bit taken aback because, to my knowledge, none of the boys in that family had the slightest interest in music or any arts at all. My niece did some dance and cheerleading, but that was it. I've been posting pictures from musicals and concerts on Facebook for some years now, and but no one on my wife's side of the family had liked or showed any interest in any of it.
Just recently, however, I had seen postings about my nephew playing in a band and wining a Battle of the Bands competition. That was so unexpected that I didn't know what to make of it. I mean, it takes time to learn an instrument, right? When did all this happen? Why had nobody said anything?
It turns out that he had learned to play bass, well enough for the competition, in, if I got this right, in about two months, and he had done it simply because a friend, completely out of the blue, had asked him. This is with no prior music background or training at all. We ended up having a long conversation about music and theater over most of the evening. Such a shock when usually we say no more than hello and goodbye at family gatherings. He kept saying "I want to come see your next show." (I hope he won't be disappointed, they are community productions after all!) But we'll see what happens. I quizzed him a closely about what it was like to perform in the competition and he seemed so unaffected by the pressure that he just seems to be a real, natural talent. It was very nice to finally connect with one of my nephews!
Just a co-incidence that this all all started right after I refocused my life with a new sense of direction and purpose? Maybe. Or maybe I was putting out stronger vibrations about living your life the way you want to and attracting more joy, and he got caught up in that. A bit of an ego perhaps? We'll see.
I have been stumbling on Abraham-Hicks videos on youtube for a while, but I really didn't understand what they were all about. They just seemed a bit weird, so I've been ignoring them. But recently I started listening to them, more and more.
Most people doing these kind of seminars have their story on their web site that explains how they got started and what they're doing. But not these people. It's all rather nebulous, but it sounds like a form of channeling. They say it not, or it's sort of like channeling but not. I don't know. Abraham sound like a, not spirit, but entity of come kind. As I say, it's not all that clear.
Anyway, it took me a bit of listening to get what they/she is/are saying. Then I started to get it and ran into a lot of resistance about accepting it. Now I'm accepting it on an intellectual level, but I feel like I have to bend my mind into a pretzel to really get it and put it into practice. It's not only my mind, it's my emotions and my body as well. (Maybe it's my energy body that's resisting?) It's really hard to explain what it's like to hold these concepts, to be these concepts. That's why I give them a lot more credence than I otherwise might. I mean, they just sound like wishful thinking. But if that's so, why do I feel like I'm rewiring my brain when I try to embody them? My body reacts in odd ways as well: When I try on holding space for these ideas, I feel strange energy flows all through my body, odd aches and pains, and weird discomforts. I can't help but think there's something to what they are saying.
So that's why I think I'm remodeling my world, slowly. but ut's happening as fast as I can conceive it happening. It would be nice if it was faster, but I believe it's as fast as I can handle, maybe even pushing my limits a bit, so I try not to push too hard. So, sure, in my mind it's perfectly possible that I'm reshaping the world around me into something I like a whole lot more. Kidding myself? Maybe. But why not feel happy and in control of your life? Being happy regardless of circumstances means your are always in control of your happiness regardless of what happens to you. That puts you in control of your life, and who doesn't want that?
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